Vampires Suck Movie Review

Vampires Suck Movie Review


Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer have pooled their talents once again to produce, well, another movie that sucks! This upcoming movie, “Vampires suck”, one of this summer’s movies playing now, is an awful parody of the movies in the “Twilight” series. Friedberg and Seltzer decided to ignore other vampire hits such as HBO’s “True Blood” series, the books of Anne Rice and even the classic, Dracula. Having done a terrible job in “Date Movie”, “Epic Movie” and “Disaster Movie”, they’ve now worked really hard to do a terrible job in Vampires Suck”.

The characters in the upcoming movie “Vampires Suck” have different names then the “Twilight” characters: Becca, played by Jenn Proske, is pursued by vampire Edward Sullen, played by Matt Lanter, and werewolf Jacob White, played by Chris Riggi.

The gags in this new movie release are extremely sophomoric, in keeping with the crowd that “Vampires Suck” is catering too. If you enjoy the humor, you’re probably pretty sophomoric yourself.

There are also tons of references to every sort of popular culture imaginable, including the Kardashians, Lindsay Lohan, Tiger Woods, “Jersey Shore” and others. There’s even a slap at Fox News! There has to be some sort of a joke or big gag every few seconds. Most are terrible. The only funny part is when the movie jokes about the fact that the werewolves run about with no shirts on for most of the “Twilight” movies. In “Vampires Suck”, Jacob and the werewolves burst into song, a la “Singing in the Rain.”

Jenn Proske really is very funny as Becca, poking fun at Kristen Stewart. Most of the lead actors are pretty good.

This one of the films on the new movie list is rated PG-13 and runs for 77 minutes.

Don’t go see this movie it sucks…and bites.


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